Love and Marriage

It occured to me just yesterday that I was having 'empty rest' syndrome!

Juju moved out after 7 months - having broken 2 radios, a small homemade table, lost 1 tv remote, crushed some OLD Christmas ornaments, ruined my bath towels with bleach slotches ...... and stole some cash, sheets, plates, cutlery. Before the day of his move he had only acknowledged that he had smashed the plasterboard that lines one side of the basement steps. He left behind garbage and clogged drains in the basement sink and shower. And not a peep since.

Stephanie, who had taken over my den as her dwelling for 2 years, left in February..... after blowing the motor on my dryer, leaving the walls covered with nail holes, a 1/2 inch of dust on all the bookshelves, unsorted recycleables in the garage, my new living room rug riddled with doggie urine stains and a clogged bathroom sink full of hair and hair product. She still owes me a month's rent.... and not a peep since.

At any rate, the house which once felt cramped now feels larger and significantly more quiet. My books and photos came up from the basement to their rightful place on the book shelves. The dustbunnies were rounded up and dispensed in the garbage. The recycling was sorted and picked up by the town.

On this beautiful afternoon I sat in my reclaimed den, amazed at the height of the grass and watching Emmy running around trying to catch petals falling from the trees. It's that time of year again..... for First Communions and Confirmations and graduations and a slew of marriages.

Let me go on record that I am a strong believer in love and marriage.

There is controversy in the church about marriage - who may and may not receive the blessing of the church.

I stand back and see marriage as having two very distinct components: 1) the legal side and 2) the love side.

Marriage has always been about legal things: property, ownership, power. From its inception - historically - marriage has had little to do with love. Only relatively recently was it included as a matter of love; God is love so by extension, someone entering into marriage brought their love for each other with them - into the church - to be witnessed before God by the community of believers.

There is much to be said about two people entering into the legal contract of marriage: it should not be done hastily (thank you, Brittney), there should be some significant forethought about the legal ramifications of this binding legal agreement, and no one - should it end - may be left destitute.

There is something to be said about two people - having already made this conscious and binding legal decision - then coming to their source for spiritual strength and support - their own faith community - to witness vows that they take of love - selfless, abiding, enriching love. We all need prayer to help us through the day - we all need the support that comes directly from God and through those who walk in the covenant of our Saviour, Jesus Christ. Grace is bestowed during sacramental marriage... the grace you need to learn to share your life and heartache and joy and pain and elation and calm and passion and struggle with. It doesn't come easily.... it takes work and time, effort and patience. Particularly in seemingly broken world, marriage needs love. It two people can work out their 'issues', with God's help, they are a source of possibility for us all. Who knows? Perhaps that Love will be contageous....... one can only HOPE so!